Friday, August 14, 2015

The Today's Show's segment on Parent's irregular work schedules

On the today's show they discussed parent's working irregular schedules and i really took it to the heart.

<<<here is the link>>>
http://on.today.com/1N7cFLG

Here is a little back story. I work my 40 hours a week Monday through Friday and part time I work as a banquet server, which sometimes I get shifts right after my hourly job. The girls dad is a banquet server only. Banquet serving hours at a hotel range! seriously from working 60 hours a week back to back to having weeks off at a time off. Some days you work in the morning, some days you work all day, other days you work at nighttime. The shifts are so random and spontaneous, its hard to really keep a routine going if you have kids, it also means that mom and dad don't always see their kids til late at night and only in the morning. Lucky for me, I have people who I know can teach my kids the way I want my kids to be taught and raised when I have to work these crazy hours, MY PARENTS!!! Don't get me wrong, I do see my kids and I try to not work the part-time job too much because my 40 hours a week are enough and my children need their mom and my house needs their house cleaner lol. And well, I don't want to do this forever, just until I get enough experience and find an opportunity to have ONE good paying job, which is hard to come by these days.

So ..........
After watching this segment of the today's show, I relate with it so much and it worries me a little.
On a daily basis when I work just my 40 hours, I am already feeling like I have no time and I have so much to do to keep from piling up before those weeks where I wake up, go to work, work all day, get home at 10 and go to bed after preparing for the next long day. My kids really do, miss out on a routine. I try to read to them on the normal weeks, meals aren't at routine times during busy weeks, which is what they are talking about. Luckily, my daughter was in preschool before she started so we got adjusted to a short day of school in preparation for a long  kindergarten day. (she just started this last week) I have to prepare her lunch the night before and outfit with shoes for her, as well as my toddlers outfit and diaper bag for their dad to take her to school or for my parents to take her. These week are tiring and hard to get time with my family. Its really difficult for relationship with your partner and children. My children are good sports, but partner it can be rough we always have to reconnect after these long weeks. I hope that what this article is indicating that maybe, my normal weeks and the fact that when they are not in the care of their parents, that the love and care of their grandparents  is enough to counteract this study. I worry for my toddler who is at the prime learning age and is so eager to learn that not being with her parents could really effect her. I worry that my five year old is missing out on her mother picking her up from school or getting a chance to really interact as parent in her school. I worry that both my daughter will grow use to not always having their parents to talk to, that when they are teens and adults that they won't feel comfortable to talk or confine in their parents. I know I can't be the only mother out there who understands and worries about the situation of being a working mother. We try to do the best for our family to survive, especially now. Hopefully, the today's show segment will shine light on this subject. It truly is difficult for a healthy home environment for children when both parents work random schedules. We millennial want the best for our families they are important and jobs don't always understand we do have a life outside of work!

Things I do to help get thru this are:

Making kids feel loved. Sometimes playing games, doing each others nails or hair, reading a book or visiting a fun attraction or just hugging and kissing your child. Instead of cleaning focus on your children!! In my five year old lunch box I like to leave little notes saying mom and dad love her, or a cute drawing I know she will love. We always eat together at the dining room table whenever we eat whether its late or early. If we just got home with the kids and its 10 pm we still eat at the table together. This is important, I think a lot of families don't eat together and talk.  Call the babysitter in between shifts just to say hi to your children. Sometimes as a mom their little voices is enough to get thru the day and for the kids its the thought of being thought of, that mommy loves me. Whenever one parent is at work and the other is at home with the kids, we snap memorable or funny photos of the kids to one another. We do all we can and that's what counts, hopefully our kids one day will understand.

Making your partner feel loved. Finding a show to watch together, dates, communication and reminding each other on a daily that you love them and miss them. Doing nice things for one another is important. Helping with those cleaning aspects of the house, if I'm off I clean the house, if he's off he cleans the house, same goes for dinner. Communication is the key, if a disconnect or a disagreement occurs you have to talk about it and fix it. Remembering why we love each other and why this partnership is important. Don't take a moment for granted. Smooching is also key. Stress reliever!! lol KISS and HOLD HANDS whenever the moment presents itself!!!

Making yourself feel loved. This is different for everyone. For me, its treating myself with makeup, getting my nails done, buying an outfit or going to forever 21 to buy a necklace for $2. If I can't afford to treat myself that week, I pay extra attention to my makeup,  I do a face mask, paint my nails, exercise, or take an extra long shower. Taking care of yourself once a week is for your sanity!!! Its important!!! When your tired, listen to yourself and take it easy. Vent to someone!!

It's important to make an effort and just manage the time you have. Make the most of the situation, nothing is ever permanent. Cherish the time you do have with your kids and remember all that really matters at the end of the day is not the money but your family's love and health. If work intervenes too much with that, time to really contemplate. I'm almost to that point, I need stability. GOOD LUCK to anyone in the same boat and I would love to hear any thoughts or tips.

xoxo,
muaahmuxo


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